MEAT

WHEN
Olden times
The end of the world

WHERE
What’s left:
A small town, a porch
Dusty
Dirty

WHO
What’s left:
Roy, Mack

NOTES
A character’s name on its own refers to a moment where they exist but do not speak, a reminder of their presence. Frequently: a beat, a shift, reflection, realization, movement.

A slash (/) indicates a point of interruption.

Words that are italicized should be emphasized or set apart in a manner of your choice.

A line break (most of the time) does not mean a pause. Roy and Mack are men with quick words, quick mouths, quick hands. When in doubt, move quick quick quick.

Roy and Mack should wear something like cowboy hats, boots, etc. but they are NOT cowboys.

 

 

1

The end of the world
Though there is no burning, no screaming
Just the aftermath

It’s dusty

An old, broken-up front porch
Torn up floorboards and rusty nails
Two men

ROY.
Mack

MACK.
Roy

ROY.
Ur still here?

MACK.
Still here

ROY.
MACK.

ROY.
Good sun today

MACK.
Yeah
Good sun

ROY.
Haven’t gotten good sun in a while

MACK.
Yeah

ROY.
MACK.
ROY.
MACK.

MACK.
I like your boots

ROY.
Thanks
Got em made special
Back uh
Before

MACK.
Yeah

ROY.
From Frank
You remember Frank?

MACK.
Yeah

ROY.
I’m glad you remember
He was a good guy

MACK.
That’s what I heard

ROY.
Last motherfucker who could make a good boot in this town
Everyone else had forgotten

MACK.
ROY.

MACK.
I remember Frank
I think

ROY.
Yeah
Yeah sure

MACK.
ROY.

MACK.
Sun’s good

ROY.
Yeah

MACK.
ROY.
MACK.
ROY.

MACK.
The sole’s comin apart

ROY.
What?

MACK.
The sole of your boot
On the left side
It’s comin/

ROY.
No it’s not

MACK.
Yes right there/ it’s

ROY.
Shit

MACK.
Sorry I
Thought I’d let you/ know

ROY.
SHIT
Frank was the only

MACK.
I know

ROY.
Last motherfucker who remembered / how to
Now there’s no one left to

MACK.
I know I know I’m sorry

MACK.

MACK.
I’m sorry

ROY.
Not ur fault

MACK.
Okay

MACK.
ROY.
MACK.
ROY.

MACK.
You’ve got big hands

ROY.
Thanks

 

2

Two men
They haven’t moved since last we saw them
Though who knows how long it’s been

MACK.
You remember who used to live here?

ROY.
Yeah fuck uh
Ross
Ross from the

MACK.
Oh Ross yes

ROY.
Ross used to run/ the laundry

MACK.
He ran the laundry
Yeah I remember

ROY.
Yeah

MACK.
Good guy
Smelled like soap
On his
hands

ROY.
Oh yeah

MACK.
Smelled like soap
All the time
Good guy

ROY.

MACK.
Good guy
I loved that guy

ROY.
You loved him?

MACK.
Yeah I loved him he was

ROY.
You loved him?

MACK.
Yes I

ROY.
Oh yeah?
Then why don’t you marry him

MACK.

MACK.
I tried
Didn’t take

ROY.
Oh

MACK.
It’s fine
I tried my best
It’s whatever

ROY.
MACK.

ROY.
I loved someone too yknow
Once

MACK.
Oh yeah?

ROY.
Yeah
My favorite horse
Nellie
Nellie rode real smooth
Had this mane as dark as you can imagine
Like soot or
Or molasses
Sweet like molasses too
Had a pair of real sweet eyes
Two little cherry pits on her sweet little face

MACK.
That sounds like a real special horse

ROY.
She was
Don’t you doubt it
Don’t you for a moment doubt it

MACK.
Okay

ROY.
I’ll kill you if you doubt it
I will I really will don’t think I won’t

MACK.
Okay man

ROY.
I’ll kill you
Like a dog
Just like that I’ll kill you like a dog

MACK.
Okay

ROY.
MACK.

MACK.
What happened to her?
To Nellie?

ROY.
They killed her
Ground her right up
Took her in the night and ground her right up

MACK.
Oh
And then/

ROY.
And then I ate her
With all the rest of them
Ate her right up

MACK.
ROY.

MACK.
Was/ she

ROY.
She was sweet
Real sweet
Barbeque

ROY.
MACK.

 

3

More of the same

ROY.
You ever love a woman?

MACK.
Maybe
I don’t know
I’m starting to think I don’t know how
I know how to love a man
Been taught my whole life
But a woman I

ROY.
That’s a shame

MACK.
Yeah

MACK.
ROY.

ROY.
I never loved a woman
Got close though

MACK.
Oh

ROY.
Little Janie Hewett
Her pap had me fix up their fence once
Just down the road there
Great girl that Janie

MACK.
Oh Janie yeah
I remember

ROY.
Great girl
Great legs
Fast
Fast legs

MACK.
What happened?

ROY.
She ran too fast
I tried to catch her but
Too fast
Even in those damn shoes she always wore
You remember
Got close
Close enough to get dust in my eye
Made me cry

MACK.
Janie?

ROY.
The dust

MACK.
Oh

MACK.
ROY.

MACK.
Do you think you could ever love a woman?
Like
In the future?

ROY.
No
I’m not fast enough
Not without Nellie
She rode real smooth you know
Real sweet, my Nellie

MACK.
Yeah

ROY.
Never gonna be fast enough without Nellie
Can’t catch Janie
Can’t catch nothin
Never

MACK.
Never?

ROY.
Never
I’m not that fast on my own
Might as well die

MACK.
Die?

ROY.
What are you, a fuckin echo?
Can’t do anything on my own
Might as well die

MACK.
I don’t want you to die

ROY.
Don’t
Don’t say that shit
I I’m not about that shit
Okay?
Fuck you

MACK.
Okay

ROY.
Yeah FUCK YOU
Don’t say that shit to me
I’ll kill you I swear I will
Like a dog

MACK.
Okay

ROY.
MACK.
ROY.
MACK.

MACK.
What happened to her?
Janie Hewett?

ROY.
I never loved her
Some fucker did though
Loved her
Fucked her
Some fast motherfucker who was faster than me

MACK.
And then?
Where is she now

ROY.
She was real sweet, that woman
Real sweet
Not as sweet as my Nellie but

MACK.
Did/ you

ROY.
Real sweet

MACK.
ROY.

 

4

More of the same

MACK.
You ever kill someone?

ROY.
I’m no killer

MACK.
I didn’t ask what you are
I asked if you ever killed someone

ROY.
I

MACK.
Did you?

ROY.

MACK.
You ever kill someone?

ROY.
Not with my hands
No
My hands are clean
I’m no killer

MACK.
Did you though?
Not with your hands
Did you?

ROY.
With my gun
The first time I used it
Even though I’ve had it my whole life
It was my pap’s but now it’s mine
Gave it to me when his hands started shaking
Couldn’t hold it straight anymore
So it was his but now it’s mine
Swinging from my belt
A lot of fellas they get scared by that you know
They get scared just lookin at my gun swinging on my belt

MACK.
You killed someone with your gun

ROY.
That fucker I told him
I told him not to talk to me like that
I warned him
I said I’d kill him if he wasn’t careful
Kill him dead like a dog
And he laughed
Like a crazy bastard he just laughed
“Ha ha ha”
And I said you dog bastard I’ll kill you dead
And he just kept going
“Ha ha ha”
And so I reached for my belt
My pap’s gun though it’s mine now
And I said fucking laugh one more time
And he got scared, that fucker
Got scared like a fuckin dog
Started whimpering n shit
Sayin oh I’m sorry oh I didn’t mean it
And I said bark
Bark you dog bastard
Bark
Cmon you dog fucker why don’t you SPEAK
YOU SCARED LITTLE DOG FUCKER
BARK BARK BARK

MACK.
ROY.

MACK.
You shot him

ROY.
Right in his shit face
Felt that steel rock back into my hand
Crack
Crack
Crack
Felt good
Alive
Maybe for the first time
Splitting the air with my pap’s gun
Splitting his fucking skull
Crack
Crack
Crack
That feeling
Like morphine
That’s the kind of shit you get addicted to
Not me
I’m saying you could get addicted
Not me though
I’m no killer
My hands are clean
It’s that dog bastard who’s dirty
Died in the dirty fuckin street

MACK.
MACK.

MACK.
Fuck

ROY.
What?

MACK.
That’s intense

ROY.
No it’s not
It’s natural
Things can’t be intense if they’re natural
I killed that dog
Like a superior beast
Like a fuckin wolf or or
Lion or some shit
That’s natural
That’s what happens in nature

MACK.
Alright

ROY.
Alright?

MACK.
Alright I said alright

ROY.
You better watch your fucking tone
I’ll kill you too don’t think I won’t

MACK.
ROY.
MACK.

MACK.
Man I’m starting to get real sick of you

ROY.
What the fuck??

MACK.
Fuck you

ROY.
Fuck you!!!

MACK.
Whatever man

ROY.
Fine!!!

MACK.
Fine

ROY.
MACK.
ROY.
MACK.

 

5

More of the same

MACK.
You ever been shot?

ROY.
Never
I’m perfect

MACK.
Alright then

ROY.
Why?
You thinkin about shooting me?
Thinkin about me getting shot?
Bleeding like a pig?
You sick pervert haha

MACK.
Jus tryna make conversation

ROY.
Don’t be weird about it

MACK.
Okay

ROY.
You’re the one imagining me getting shot
Freak
Hahahah
What’s wrong with you?

MACK.
Nothing’s wrong/ with

ROY.
No ‘cause what the fuck is wrong with you?
Huh?
Thinkin about shooting me
Bleeding me
Like a pig
Hanging in one of them shops hahaha
Open me up and look at my insides
You want to see me kick and thrash
And bleed
Pervert

MACK.
I never said that

ROY.
Didn’t have to
Could see it in your pervert eyes
You hid it for so long but I see it now
I never trusted you yknow
Always had a feeling you weren’t quite right
No you
You

ROY.

ROY.
Hahaha
Hahahaha!!!!!
You’re lookin at me the same way they looked at Nellie
Sweet Nellie before they got her
Stole her and bled her and looked at her insides
Bet they liked watching her bleed before they ground her right up
Licked their sick pervert lips
You youyou
You’re just like them
Haha!!!!!!!
Tryna shoot me dead
I knew it I knew I KNEW it would come to this

He reaches for his belt
Fumbles
The gun is heavy and clumsy in his shaking hands

ROY.
Didn’t I fucking tell you to watch yourself?
Watch how you talk to me or I’ll kill you dead don’t think I won’t
That’s what I said, wasn’t it hahaha
WATCH YOURSELF
Don’t watch me with your pervert eyes WATCH YOURSELF
You dirty fucking pervert
I’ll kill you and your dirty fucking eyes
Then I’ll be clean my hands’ll be clean this town will be

Looming like a shadow, Mack lunges at Roy
Becomes a snarling, hungry thing
There’s clawing and flailing
A tangling of heavy limbs

Mack gets a knee on Roy’s chest and a hand around the barrel of his gun
Slams it into Roy’s head

Crack
Crack
Crack

MACK.
MACK.
MACK.

MACK.
FUCK YOU
FUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOU
FUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOU

 

6

More of the same

ROY.
ROY.
ROY.

MACK.
You ever love someone?

ROY.

MACK.
Yeah me neither
Hahaha

ROY.

MACK.
I lied earlier
Never loved anyone
Never ever ever
…
Ha!!
I don’t even think I know how
I was never taught
No one ever taught me
How am I supposed to know things that no one ever
Nevermind

ROY.

MACK.
Pervert
I’m no pervert
You’re the fuckin pervert
Fuckin
Perverse
This town was never fucking clean
I’m not the fuckin deviant they are
They all are
Dirty fuckin town

ROY.

MACK.
Frank beat on his girl
All the time I saw it
I saw it I remember
He made a fine boot and he beat his girl
And Ross used to live in this house but he don’t anymore
Fucker up and left like a coward
Ran like a bitch
Wasn’t fast enough to catch that bitch but I got close
Close enough to
Close enough/
Andand Janie Hewett was a whore and you could smell it on her skin
Could smell it all the time
Everyone knew it
Everyone could smell it on her
She stank of it
Like shit
And Nellie was a shit horse!!!!
Ugliest fucking horse I’ve ever seen!!!!!!
Hahahaha!!!!!!!
Worthless fuckin horse that’s why we

ROY.
ROY.
ROY.

MACK.
You ever kill anyone?

ROY.

MACK.
Haha

ROY.
ROY.
ROY.

MACK.
Good sun today
Haven’t gotten good sun in a while
All this will dry soon
All of this

More of the same

 

Written by Cypress Cai

For recorded performance:

Cast: Warren Riley (ROY), Ian Pirotto (MACK)

Director: James Stutts

Stage Manager: Andrés Barrera

Costume Designer: Matthew Lee

Scenic Designer: Tae Scholl

Lighting Designer: Grant Sapcharoenlert

Sound Design: Michael Chen

 

About the Artist

Cypress Cai is a playwright, director, dramaturg, and current student at the UCLA School of Theatre, Film, and Television. A lover of all things off-kilter, Cypress aims to connect real people through heightened unreality. Their interests tread into the new and unknown as well as back through time-worn stories. They are currently Artistic Director of The Shakespeare Company at UCLA, the university’s premiere student-led classical theatre company, and Literary Manager at Untitled Theatre Company, an organization for student playwrights. They’re also occasionally a costume designer, illustrator, poet, and casual philosopher.