VARIATIONS ON AN APOCALYPSE
As fireflies have been disappearing due to human activity, it was important for scientists to get a better
picture of their status in Israel, so they could better protect the species.
—The Jerusalem Post
April 21, 2021
My friend Bilal, whose students
Asked me questions and told me stories
In English, has told us, his community
On Facebook, “Tell the world about us.
We are not just a breaking news
On the screens that shifts one by one.
We have our life,
Children,
And our dreams.”
In Brazil, the people
Place Akfana on the beach
In honor of the children who have been killed.
Attend to them, a man in a black-and-white scarf
Over his shoulders.
The flag blows in the sea wind
Behind a twenty-foot-long sign that reads “Why?”
My friend Ahmed did not hear from his family for days.
He appears on television anyway,
Wrecked, exhausted, sorrowful.
He declares his humanity.
I know he knows he is not allowed
To be angry. He has to,
He knows, stay cool.
Another friend changes her Facebook photo,
Declaring she stands with Israel.
Bilal writes,
This autumn
Was not only a month
Of fallen leaves, but for souls
And consciences as well.
Mohammed’s (in Istanbul) brother (in Gaza) sends him
Short videos of blazes that surround him.
Another friend (from here in the US) posts fireworks,
And for a moment I don’t know what they are.
I remember a night
Three years ago, that long,
When I tried to film fireflies
On my iPhone, to send to Ahmed (in London).
I was just about to share the darkness
That intermittently opened with tiny dabs of light.
But then Mohammed (still in Gaza then)
Posted a video in real time
Of darkness with tiny dabs of light.
Light will always look bigger in darkness.
It’s the thing we all look for.
I wondered if there are fireflies in Gaza too,
And the light is bombs
Being dropped
Without there being a word of it on anything
With words.
I deleted my little film.
I remember my initiation
To becoming a US citizen. How I was one
Of sixteen people with fair skin in the room
Of 200.
And how we all were instructed to rise
And sing the National Anthem of America
To a gigantic PowerPoint slide of Donald Trump.
And I remember worrying about everyone
At the rockets’ red glare part
And again at the bombs bursting in air part.
I wanted to say
We don’t have to sing this part.
This isn’t entirely necessary.
Like it was just bonus points
On a quiz.
Ahmed has told me about
Rockets dropping on bedrooms
Where his cousins were sleeping.
A friend posts a map of Israel
With dates and names of cities
In bright colors.
I don’t know exactly what’s being said here,
But I sense it’s about the people living,
Which has somehow become a problem.
In 2020
A scientific survey revealed
With the help of 1,548 responses
That there were more than 6,000 sightings
Of “the lightning bug,” said The Jerusalem Post,
Which goes on to say that the survey
Was designed to map
The presence of fireflies in Israel
And better understand
What environments are most
Hospitable for them.
Just weeks ago,
Bilal sent me photographs
Of his children standing under an olive tree.
Today from a courtyard
Of a UN shelter, he shares a photo
Of children after stopping a game with a ball
(One boy holds the ball)
As though a foul has been called and everyone
Has to stand still a moment.
I stand still
A moment.
The children are looking up.
About the Author
Laura Hope-Gill is a deaf writer and painter. Her work appears in 13th Moon, Bayou, Cape Rock, Chattahoochee Review, Cincinnati Review, Diagram, Illuminations, Laurel Review, Madison Review, Parabola, Primavera, Owen Wister Review, Rivendell, Sortes, Spillway, Xavier Review, and other journals. She holds an MFA in Poetry from Warren Wilson College.